My True Story #No47
“I generally probably come across quite confident and stuff on social media, but the pic I shared was at a time where I was really struggling with my looks and especially weight.” - Vas
“I generally come across quite confident on social media, but the picture I shared was at a time (that I'm still going through to be honest and have been for a long while now) where I was really struggling with my looks and especially weight.
I remember going out on that evening and feeling really awful about the way my body looked and I went through several consecutive quite severe episodes of self hate, depression and I guess body dysmorphia possibly?
I genuinely contemplated suicide several times during these episodes (which would last a while) and I remember crying a hell of a lot about not being 'thick' enough or having a curvy and meaty enough body.
I just felt awful to the point where leading up to this evening I overate to try and gain some weight to fit in the dress (I lost a drastic amount of weight due to stress).
I'm better now I think - but whenever someone brings up the way my body looks or how it's changed I still feel like bursting into tears and comments about my body (positive or critical) trigger me into wanting to overeat so I can get the 'ideal' body type.
It's all very toxic to be honest - wanting to be 'perfect' has a lot to do with it.
If anyone's struggling with the same thing, I'd suggest unfollowing any IG models etc and even having a social media purge, and also take pictures of your body and yourself where you feel beautiful and admire those pictures.
I follow unconventionally looking women who are boss bitches and don't take any shit, and they actually help! I'm also happy to talk to anyone who might have the same issue and feels alone or wants a friend :) it's a very frustrating thing to go through, and I'm still going through it, but it gets better. Slowly.” True Story told by @__.versace